contains

public int contains(int index)

Today, I was feeling in the mood, so I walked into the kitchen with only my boxers on and asked my girlfriend if she wanted to get in bed. She said, "Okay, but make sure to finish before Gossip Girl starts." FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).

get

public int get(int index)

Today, my girlfriend of 2 months decided to wrestle with my younger brother. He has gotten more action than I have. FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).

remove

public String remove(int index)

Today, I bought a new, expensive face moisturizer. However, it smells like poop. I paid $20 dollars to make my face smell like shit. FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).

equals

public int equals(int index)

Today, my 72 year old Grandmother informed me she's running for mayor. She's been going around town with home made signs all day campaigning to win mayor. She lives in my town. My friend called me asking me if she was high. FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).

indexOf

public String indexOf(int index)

Today, I had a volleyball game against our rivals. I hit myself in the face with the ball 3 times, fell flat on my face against the court, and later had an asthma attack with no inhaler in sight. We lost the game. FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).

remove

public boolean remove(int index)

Today, I found out that there is literally a giant hole in my son's bedroom because my son wanted to build a "secret entrance." FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).

iterator

public void iterator(int index)

Today, I decided to drive my mothers Bentley. She is out of town and told me not to go near the car. Being 17, I didn't listen. As I was backing out the driveway, I was hit by an SUV, seriously damaging my moms car. Who was driving the SUV? My mom, coming home early. FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).

iterator

public boolean iterator(int index)

Today, I found out that one of my best mates had his backpack, clothes, and everything else in it stolen at an airport overseas. I was feeling sorry for him all day. It took me 9 hours to remember that I actually loaned him my backpack for his trip. FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).

lastIndexOf

public void lastIndexOf(int index)

Today, my mom told me I was conceived on Halloween. She thought it would be funny to say "Let's just say your dad was not wearing his ghost costume." She then winked. I am now scarred for life. FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).

get

public String get(int index)

Today, on my way to work, the obese old guy in the house opposite mine offered me tips on my yoga technique. Not only were his tips helpful, but I now know I should either close my curtains or put clothes on when I do yoga. FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).

toArray

public boolean toArray(int index)

Today, I received my first compliment in a really long time. It went, "Hey, you don't look like crap today." FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).

toArray

public String toArray(int index)

Today, I learned that my apartment's walls are thin enough for my neighbors to hear my vibrator. I've lived in this apartment for three years. I've been single and horny for all of them. FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).

isEmpty

public void isEmpty(int index)

Today, I found out that my employers hired me under the assumption that I was gay. Apparently, they are attempting to be perceived as more open-minded. I'm not gay, but I'm afraid being straight could cost me my job. FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).

containsAll

public boolean containsAll(int index)

Today, I went to the bookstore. While I was in line, I heard everyone talking about how a book cart had gotten loose and rolled down the parking lot into a car, smashing the front. It was my car. FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).

add

public int add(int index)

Today, the elevator broke in my dorm and won't be fixed for several days. I live on the 26th floor. FML

Parameters:

index - index of first element to be returned from the list iterator (by a call to the next method).

Returns:

a list iterator of the elements in this list (in proper sequence), starting at the specified position in this list.

Throws:

IndexOutOfBoundsException - if the index is out of range (index < 0 || index > size()).